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To My Future Wife and Kids

I don’t know if I should tag this a letter or just simply put it as a note to you, my dearest wife and my unborn kids, about the kind of father I crave to be. A lot of good writers have divergent opinions about their plans for the future with their wife, children and a happy home. I have shared in their wealth of wisdom and I perfectly understand the joy in having a happy family. With what I have been able to fathom and other experiences I’ve gathered, I am prompted to write this so that you both will know the plan I have for our family and how doable I pray it manifest.

Sweetheart, I can still remember all promises and good impression of me I gave to you when I was wooing you. I promised to be your everything and always put a smile on your beautiful face. Never had anything to hide from you, neither was I a swank, that’s why I even put all the experiences I gathered in my previous relationship into writing titled ‘Diary of My Ex(es)’. If you would recall all that I wrote in that dairy, I will appreciate you sharing them with our kids because being a good father starts with being a good husband.

My dearest kids, I made several promises about always being approachable when you are faced with challenges. Don’t see me as your husband or father alone but you all can see me as your guide and closest pal. I’ll always be willing to hear your troubles, share your worries and experiences and we all will sit as one big family to resolve whatever issue.

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Who am I when I was your age to discuss relationship matters or even go as far as talking about sex related issues with my Dad? Even though your Grandpa always look nice, there is always limitations to what we could share with him because we believe it will be repugnant in his sight. I actually lacked some basic facts about keeping relationships then and I promised myself that I will always talk to you guys periodically about sex education. Wouldn’t like to infringe on your individual privacy or will I ever shut the doors on your friends from coming to see you or hanging out with them, but I will appreciate meeting them both individually and collectively so as to know the kind of company you keep. I will always be glad to meet the persons stealing my sons’ or daughters’ heart away at the appropriate time.

Family vacation, shopping and special holiday trips are part of my plans to make our family a united one. I never had a boring childhood and I don’t intend to have one with you guys too. I believe creating a forum where all of us will be happy together, meet new people and share ideas with other individuals will go a long way in cementing our nuclear family relationship.

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Being hostile to children is one thing I find repellent. Though I don’t believe in spoiling the child and sparing the rod but I will definitely improvise ways of dealing with you guys if found wanting, most especially in your education and religious lifestyle because in as mush as I want to make you guys comfortable with life, I won’t abhor any form of indiscipline from you all.

I have never craved to have any shambolic relationship with your mother and I pray we will never have any cause to break our homes. I will always be there to swaddle you guys at my leisure and also reiterate how much I appreciate you all in my life. Will work tirelessly to give you guys a swanky lifestyle that me your father never had the opportunity to enjoy.

Till then, I still remain your humble husband, father, guardian and pal.

Kolawole Oladimeji

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